On Friday, after a day in the neonate ward, four of us headed out to Sipi Falls for the weekend. The falls are a beautiful series of drop offs that are each about 100 meters high set in the foothills of Mt. Elgon where coffee, bananas, avocado, and passion fruit, among other crops, are grown for sustenance and income. We stayed at a lodge owned by a Brit and run by locals. But probably the most memorable aspect of the weekend was the transportation to and from Sipi Falls.
In the week before our trip, we called several drivers that either we had hired previously to drive here in the city or had been recommended to us. We received quotes ranging from 400,000 Ugandan Shillings ($160 US) to a few million shillings and so naturally we opted for the 400,000 USH option, which, you can judge for yourself, might have been unwise.
On Friday after work, we waited at the Guest House as the driver, 'Don', showed up 30 minutes late. He pulled up in a Toyota station wagon of some sort and began to explain that for our comfort, he borrowed a larger car Because the care was larger, the fuel cost would be more expensive that he had originally estimated and thus he said that he needed to charge us more, specifically 25,000 more for each person, bringing the cost to a total of 500,000 round trip. We voiced our resistance to spending more considering we had agreed upon a price beforehand. We had also specifically told him that we only wanted a larger car if the price would still be 400,000 USH. After some discussion we agreed to the new price and he also explained that he needed money up front to pay for gas. Reluctantly, we paid Don 300,000 and got into the care and began our journey to to Sipi Falls.
About five minutes into our trip, we pulled into a gas station to fill up gas (180,000), and apparently to top off the oil, hydraulic fluid and to replace the spare (60,000) that none of had realized was in the left rear of the car. Don also ran across the street holding the money in his hand and went into what appeared to be an auto parts store. After all of the necessary maintenance and repairs, we set off again.
About twenty minutes into our journey, after talking with Don about Uganda, his family etc, we pulled over for Don to give 60,000 to his fiance and child. At this point, Don has spent the 300,000 that we have given him, 240,000 in overhead and 60,000 for his family (ie profit).
We continued on our way and we asked Don to stop somewhere to get some 'Rolexes', which are chapati's (kind of like naan flatbread) with fried egg on top that are then rolled together. He told us that he would take us to a rolex stand that he knows and trust. Because traffic was absolutely awful, he drove us on a shortcut that seemed to be quite effective, bypassing the rush hour traffic entirely. Finally we got to his neighborhood, Seeta, and parked across the street from a rolex stand. We ordered three chapatis and Don ordered himself some food and put it on our tab. As we walked back to the car, Don explained to me that he needed 30,000 more right now. So I gave him 30,000 and told the rest of the group that we had now paid a total of 330,000. We got into the car and Don held out the 30,000 out of the window and, without a word, handed the money to a woman that had been quietly standing about 20 meters from the car.
About 45 minutes into the drive, Don pulled into a gas station and said that he was going to get water. As he was parking, he asked if we wanted water and we said that we didn't need any, at which point he started driving again. We were all puzzled and then explained that it was entirely fine for him to get water for himself. He drove back around, parked and went to get water. It seemed to us that he was expecting us to buy water for him, but there was never any direct communication, so we remained a little confused, but Don got his water and we continued our trek.
Don communicated to us that he would be stopping at his "mom's" or "auntie's" (in quotation marks simply because I wasn't totally clear on the relationships despite Don's explanations) house on the way to pick up food, a request that we were fully supportive of.
At one point we were driving along the Ugandan countryside and he quickly slowed down and pulled onto the side of the road, did a U-turn and greeted his mom and another woman. We drove back about 100 meters and turned into a fairly hidden grass drive way. Don's auntie came out of the home with a black plastic bag and gave it to Don, who gave his auntie 7,000.
Don kindly offered us the roasted corn and sweet potato that his auntie had packed for him, but we declined, explaining that we were planning on eating dinner at the lodge.
Shortly after the stop for food, we were caught in a major downpour. Visibility was about 1 meter and the windshield was fogging up. We asked Don if he wanted to stop and wait out the storm and he chuckled, saying that he could see and that there was no problem. At one point, I saw how the distance between us and the side of the road was increasing and I reached over to the steering wheel and considered nudging it back but saw that Don steered us back on course.
After what seemed to be about 15 or 20 minutes of torrential rain, the weather cleared and Don pointed out that he hadn't needed to stop.
As we approached our destination, along winding mountain roads in the dark of night, Don stopped a couple of times for directions. At one turn, I had to warn him that he was headed for a median.
As he didn't convince us that he was totally clear on the route, we called the lodge and asked Don to talk with them for clarification. Despite his protestations that he didn't have to stop to talk on the phone, we forced Don to pull over.
We continued along the winding road and started slowing down to see the signs advertising accommodations. At one point, we pulled off the road to shine the headlights on a sign and as Don was trying to read the sign, the car was rolling forward and I saw that we were just a few feet from a 10 foot deep ditch. With visions of having to climb out of the car as it sits vertically in a ditch, I said "Do not move forward!" Fortunately, Don stopped at the last minute.
When finally made it to the lodge, Don seemed to indicate that maybe he could stay with us because his dad, with whom he said he was going to stay, was too far away and would cost too much in gas money. As our agreement, which we had made abundantly clear just involved him getting us to and from Sipi Falls, we said that that would not work, and Don was able to arrange to stay with someone down the road from our hotel. We agreed that we would see Don back in the lodge at 1 PM on Sunday and we parted ways.
On Sunday at about 12:20 PM, we had just sat down for lunch when, to our delight, Don arrived. We finished our lunch and as I walked to the car, Don started mentioning something about miscalculation. I just kept walking and said that we would talk about this in Kampala. We loaded our bags in the car and started getting in as Don says "As I was trying to explain to you, I miscalculated..." He went on to explain that he had been planning on staying at his dad's home but that it would have cost too much money in fuel so he stayed with a neighbor of the lodge and owed them money, that he had spent money on food, that the car would need oil, hydraulic fluid etc etc.
He said that he needed 10,000 to pay the two gentlemen that were hovering near us. So we gave them 10,000 to cover his lodging, saying that it was coming out of what we owed him. We said to him that we would pay for the gas to get to Kampala and that any money left over from the 500,000 that we had agreed on in Kampala would be his. We made this offer several times, and Don seemed to repeatedly indicate that he didn't find those terms agreeable. I told him that he wouldn't be holding us hostage in Sipi Falls and that if he didn't accept our agreement within the 8 minutes remaining until 1:00 PM, we would take a bus back to Kampala.
When the discussions appeared to be going nowhere, I went in to the lodge, got some toilet paper to check the oil and asked about the buses to get back to Kampala. I came back out to the car and told Don to open the hood. I checked the oil and it was full, which made sense because he had filled it when we first left Kampala. Then he said that the hydraulic fluid was low. To me, it looked like there was enough liquid.
When it was clear that we were making no progress with Don, we took our bags out of the car and told him that we would take the bus. He then explained that we were abandoning him and the car and he asked "How am I going to get to Kampala?" We reiterated our offer to get the car and all 5 of us to Kampala, but he still wouldn't agree. We walked the 30 yards out of the lodge and stood at the bus stop. Several kids offered us a ride to Mbale to catch the bus and said, referring to Don "You shouldn't go with him. He may leave you stranded".
As we waited for the matatu to Mbale, one of the lodge employees came out, apparently as a mediator sent by Don because he informed us that Don accepted our offer. I told the employee that it was too late, and that if he accepted, he should speak to us himself.
A few minutes after the lodge employee walked away, Don slowly pulled out of the lodge and just looked at us out of the car. He asked me to come over and told me that he accepted our offer. I responded that we had decided to take the bus back and I walked back to the group, where we deliberated whether to take the bus or go with Don. Despite our reservations, we decided to go with Don, partly out of convenience, but also because we didn't necessarily want to leave Don stranded.
So we got in the car, drove down the mountainside and into the first town. There we passed a large mob of people that were partaking in a circumcision ceremony that is traditional in that region of Uganda. As the crowd passed, some of them gave us the peace sign with there fingers, to which I reciprocated, drawing elated cheers from the crowd. Don explained that that is the symbol of the opposition party, while the thumbs up is a symbol of Museveni's party.
We drove out of town on the main road and suddenly Don turned right on a dirt road, explaining that it was a shortcut to avoid the 'fake' (meaning potholed) road we had taking previously. We vociferously vetoed that option so he looped around and got back on the main road.
The road came to a T, where we turned left and filled up gas. Here, we agreed to pay 80,000 in gas and 15,000 for hydraulic fluid. We paid it directly to the gas station attendant and got back in the car.
As Don pulled out of the station, he started turning in the opposition direction in which we were originally headed. Again, we protested and said that we wanted to take the same route we had taken on the way there. He explained that he wanted to stop by his dad's home to get food. We strongly opposed this, mostly because we weren't sure if he had some ulterior plans and we figured that he had either eaten breakfast or he could stop at his auntie's again for food.
Don's reaction to our demands included claims that we were treating him like an animal by ordering him to drive and not letting him eat. He also complained that we hadn't invited him for lunch. At one point in the discussion, we offered him an Odwalla Superfood bar. This just offended him more and he continued to say that we were treating him like an animal and expecting him to eat chocolate (referring to the bar) when we had eating a nice meal. We failed to point out that 1) the Superfood bar costs about $2.50 US, 2) that it traveled from the US in a suitcase, 3) that two members of the group had brought large stores of these bars and were eating them every day, and 4) that it might represent the absolute pinnacle of the science of nutrition.
Finally, we agreed that as long as this would be the last stop to Kampala, we were fine with him stopping.
We drove a few minutes on the road and then, to our surprise, turned on to a dirt walking path, aka singletrack. In other words, where full sized, four wheel vehicles don't drive. This path meandered through crops and forest. We drove on this singletrack for probably about 3-5 kilometers. Finally we got to Don's old home. He said that it would be a quick stop. We debated whether to get out to go to the bathroom and finally opted to just use the facilities, which consisted of a cylinder of bricks about 4 or 5 feet high for privacy.
After Don spent about 10-15 minutes chatting and eating with family members, he took a large bag of nuts and put them in the trunk of the car. We got in the car, drove on the walking path for another few kilometers and got back on the highway.
The rest of the trip went smoothly and we made just one more stop on the way back to Kampala for Don to pick up a large bag of rice. When we got to the guest house, we gave Don the remainder of what we owed him (15,000).
The whole ordeal was quite memorable. My sense is that Don, who claimed to have worked as a driver for a touring company, either doesn't have a sense about how to estimate overhead, which in my mind includes housing and food for his weekend, or that he planned on having us cover his overhead without telling us in advance. I'm not sure if this has worked for him in the past or if it works for other drivers, but it didn't really work this time. I understand that his life doesn't even fit the saying "living paycheck to paycheck", but in the end, if he's trying to run his own business, he's not winning himself any referrals with his business plan.
As for his profit over the weekend, we know he made the 60,000 that he gave his fiance and son, the 30,000 that he gave to the mysterious lady, and then 15,000 that we gave him in the end. Interestingly, at one point in one of our several discussions, he indicated that the 60,000 that he gave his fiance and son were part of the trip expenses. We pointed out that one works in order to feed their family and that the payment to his family constitutes profit. Overall, his total profit was at least about 105,000 for 2.5 days. He might even get some reimbursement from whoever lent him the car for fixing the flat tire. We're told that police officers here make 150,000 ($50) a month, which isn't enough to support a family so they supplement their income with bribes. If Don makes 105,000 every 3 days, in one month he would make 1,050,000. So, in my mind, I don't think Don actually made off too badly even if he didn't make as much as he had hoped.
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